Review of Hakuchuumu no Aojashin
| Subject | Hakuchuumu no Aojashin |
| By | Helpfulness: 12 Vote: 9funnerific on 2023-02-19 last updated on 2023-02-22 |
| Review | I read the 18+ version first, then the Steam one (link to this same review in Steam). If we completely set aside the translation, the game overall got noticeably better in the latter. It somewhat breaks a fairly important story moment in case 1 by changing how a former H-scene plays out (even if the act still happens), and it also breaks the logic of one line in a comical conversation due to the removal of a preceding explicit joke. Outside of that, it makes sex-related words throughout the game more tame, but all the meaning outside of jokes is still there. One sex scene got removed entirely, which made that story noticeably less spicy as the protag is underage, even if there was no penetration, but it was by far the least interesting story and all the other sex still happens. You might already be familiar with the large list of new things this version adds to the game. Basically, the dress looks fine and was a necessary replacement, the rest are all good, especially the new extra scenarios and the BGM gallery (can you believe a 2020 game didn't have one?). I had a big problem with the way the original game ended—not because of the fate of the characters or anything like that, but because the finale just felt unpolished and the scenes were out of place in a story-first VN, especially one of such high quality (it ends on a stream of H-scenes). The all-ages version fixes that to a degree, and also treats you to comical extra scenarios after the epilogue, all of which I really liked. The problem, however, is the English translation. I won't scream do not play it, as much as I'm tempted to, but just be aware that you're reading a total mess full of mistranslations and typos. I'm not talking about the announced changes to case 1 here—I came prepared for those and looked the other way. Let's break the issue down a bit: 1) Translation. The EN version is riddled with mistranslations (if you want some examples, 1-2, potential minor spoilers in the rest: 3-4, 5-6, 7-8, 9-10, 11-12, 13-14, 15, 16, 17, 18—three of these are from case 3, the rest are from case 1, and these are far from being all the instances in each "case"). You can also simply open the in-game menu and find "Screen Effects". Notice how it's set to "OFF" by default? If you set it to "ON", it will remove the screen effects, because the original is 画面演出のカット. This is only the tip of the iceberg. Thankfully, the game has a nice, nowadays common feature of quickly changing between languages (you can press "e" for English and "j" for Japanese) which allows quick and easy comparisons if you're familiar with JP. 2) Editing. It's actually good most of the time, especially in case 2 where the editor seems to have gone all-out. However, there are several instances of inserted values. A clear and spoiler-free example of this is in case 1 where, in the expression proper lady, they put judgmental quotation marks around the word proper because they didn't like the writer's Japanese view of the subject (1-2). And for a spoilery example, when, in narration, the protag of case 1 talks about how he raped his wife because he's weak as a person, the translation adds "trash" out of nowhere (1-2), brazenly showing the TL team's disgust for his actions. There's nothing in the surrounding lines to warrant that addition. Also bonus 1-2. 3) Proofreading. Nonexistent. 4 people are credited with QA, but if they did any work, their input must've never reached anyone. Lots of typos throughout the game—especially early on, I think. It even gets as bad as this. If you can help it, read it in Japanese. If not, well, this still beats MTL by a long shot (and only the wicked would MTL story-heavy fiction anyway). The VN is beautiful and amazing, as almost every other review will tell you. |
| 12 points |
